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Verbal Dexterity: Talking the Talk » Blog Archive » A Chicken In Every Pot and A Presidential Bon Mot: How To Speak & Act Like The Ultimate Chief Executive

A Chicken In Every Pot and A Presidential Bon Mot: How To Speak & Act Like The Ultimate Chief Executive

As tomorrow is Election day, I thought that it would be good to write about something “Presidential.”

As you are well aware by now, McCain and Obama have very different speaking styles. One tries to be “Joe the Plumber” folksie, my friend while the other likes to be the grand orator and agent of change.

Both styles have their place (irrespective of your personal politics).

The key is to pick a style that works well with your personality and position.

So, in the rare event that you ever seek the highest public office (and with tongue firmly in cheek), here’s how even you can sound and act Presidential:

  • Always carry a podium with you. You never know when someone will ask you about the state of the union.
  • Even when ordering from a fast food drive-through, use a tele-prompter. One missed word and that cheeseburger could become a baked potato with broccoli.
  • Blame all mistakes on your Vice President–that’s what they are in office for.
  • Prior to being sworn in, you can consider your oven, dishwasher and toaster to be your kitchen “cabinet.
  • When your spouse yells at you for sleeping late on Saturday, you can inform them that you are exercising your “Executive Privilege.”
  • Always encourage your female interns to bring their dresses to the dry cleaner.
  • Fire any translator that suggests that the Ambassador to Lichtenstein just delivered a UN address wherein he declared war on all sweat socks and under-garments.
  • Always begin any international negotiation with a high five, some silly string and 3 uses of the word “dude.”
  • Prior to spending Thanksgiving with your in-laws, send in “peace-keepers” to survey the surroundings and terrain.
  • Whenever defrosting anything in your microwave, avoid shouting “I just nuked it.”
  • Don’t ever review your family’s budget in a chinese restaurant. They will resent you when you try to cut out the “pork.”

    Today’s Tip: To be Presidential, you have to sound and act Presidential: Use grandiose phrases, catchy slogans and always check the mirror to see that you have no hanging chads.

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